Expectations are EVERYTHING when building a home. If you’re thinking about building, in the process of building or still dealing with the emotional aftermath of building, I hope this helps.

I’ve had countless conversations over the years helping my clients have the right expectations. Sometimes I feel more like a life coach than designer helping them emotionally and mentally get through the process!? I’m going to channel my inner strength because sometimes you just need to be bold and say some hard things. So put your big girl panties on and let’s acknowledge some truth.

You are blessed!

The attitude of gratitude will get you a long ways when crap hits the fan (which always happens). Listen, we live in the richest country in the world! If you own a home, you’re wealthier than 94% than all the people in the world. Of that 6%, very few get to build their own dream home! Losing the spirit gratitude in a build will make you more emotional and hinder your ability to stay creative and flexible.
Right Expectation: Building a house is very emotional. Practicing gratitude will keep you grounded.

Inspiration isn’t reality!

Every house starts with inspiration. We have an amazing amount of resources to get visually inspired! Just keep in mind that you may be inspired by a million dollar house and you CANNOT get that look for half the price. Inspiration can misguide your expectations so be very careful accumulating your looks and desires and make sure it matches your budget. It’s the biggest battle I face with my clients because there are so many little details that can significantly increase your costs.

Right Expectation: Rarely does the reality turn out like the inspiration. Allow for the house differences, budget differences and the creative process to dictate the outcome that you will still love and enjoy!

The builder is not out to get you!

The majority of builders are good men and women who love building homes! Do your due diligence before selecting and then lean in and trust them. Taking a house from 2 dimensional to 3 dimensional and orchestrating over 50 plus trades to get it done is a task that deserves respect. I’ve seen so many clients think they know how to build a house, question the builder at every step and delay the process unnecessarily. Believe when I say, they want the house done and to look amazing just as much as you! Try to not be so impatient and take things so personal as it only complicates the build. Your builder is not a magician nor a mind reader so be sure you fully explain your whats and needs so it gets done right the first time. If it’s not done right, don’t freak out. Most mistakes can be resolved and both parties are happy.

Right Expectation: Your builder will make mistakes and your expectation should be just that! Communication is KEY to enjoy the building process.

Weather delays are real!

Here’s the deal with weather, it sincerely makes an impact . Unfortunately, this is just the reality! There are 2 important factors I want you to keep in mind. One, certain weather can undermine the quality of a build. For instance, you cannot brick in weather below 32 degrees and paint needs a certain climate to dry properly inside and out. Secondly, the trades don’t want to miss out on work. Most live pay check to pay check providing for their families and missing work impacts their lives greatly. So if they don’t show up because of weather it’s because it’s necessary!
Right Expectation: Expect weather to delay your build and be prepared for it to take longer than expected!

You will always be over budget!

Now that I’ve knocked the wind out of you, let me share some good news. You have a lot of control over it! Where some increases are inevitable, like a retaining wall or another structural building necessity, what I’ve seen is most overages come from the owners’ personal choices. If unforeseen costs arise, the options to save in other areas can happen and not sacrifice the look or enjoyment of your home. But it’s up to you to make those hard choices, not the builder. Oh, by the way… they hate when you’re over too!
Right Expectation: Financially prepare for overages. On average, a build can be 20% more than what’s expected!

It’s like having a baby!

Listen, I liken building a home to child bearing because of all the highs and lows:
*The initial excitement and preparation!

*The hope and dreams of a new future!

*The pain and agony of it coming out!

*Hating everyone in the process (especially close to the end)!

*The elation when it’s all over!

I’ve had three kids and I’ve built one home… the process and experiences are very similar. I truly do understand all the time, money and energy that gets tied up in the hope of building a house. I’ll be honest, years ago I lost my cool on my builder one time during our build. I had to go back and apologize and to this day I regret letting my emotions dictate my behavior. Now that I’m a designer and understand the process so much better, I realize my expectations weren’t right.

Like I said before, stay grateful, have the right expectations, communicate with compassion and your building experience will be much more enjoyable!!

“My soul, wait thou only upon God for my EXPECTATION is from Him.” Psalm 62:5

Designer with a purpose,

Micah Abbananto